hey. fuck you.

this is the standard "about the author" page, and i'm going to be self-indulgent, and you're going to sit, and you're going to read all my self-indulgent thoughts, and you're not going to complain. but fear not, this is not going to be as self-indulgent as the frequently asked questions page that was up here before. there won't be any angry, gratuitous cheerleader put-downs . i promise.

stuff you should know: my birthday is january 20, 1981, making me either an aquarius or a capricorn, i live in mount prospect, il, i go to prospect high school, i have two brothers (josh, 12, and tyler, 9), two parents, a cat (chavez), and a boyfriend (chris), i don't drive, i work at the library, i alternate between being loud and being quiet, i have glow-in-the-dark star stickers on my bedroom ceiling, i'd like to go to antioch college, the smell of permanent marker on the bathroom wall intoxicates me, it makes me sad to eat chocolate easter bunnies cos i feel like i'm killing something, i can't sing.

things i hate: scary vampires, deadheads, "the denny's people", "the denny's people", "the denny's people", "the denny's people", whores, men, mosquitos, leaky pens, the birds that wake me up every morning, math, bastard teachers, working, sugar ray, sports, jocks who shove pickles up other jocks' asses, jocks w/ lipfuls of herpes, having my soul trampled upon, headaches, cough syrup.

things i like: spring and winter, the smiths, transvestites, drag queens, and cross-dressers, reading, writing, big pants, castration, armed revolution, willy wonka and the chocolate factory, roald dahl, fire, kick-ass teachers, people who haven't seen titanic, outsmarting people, pineapple gummi bears, hello kitty, the smell of citrus in the morning, nailpolish.